My underage friend was dressed as Touhou and she told me that an adult male commented on how “sexy” she was and then he grabbed her boobs and ran away. I was infuriated and asked her to give me a description of the guy so I could tell security to look for him. She refused to tell me and blew it off as “It’s fine, it has happened to me before.” This made me even more mad, but I tried to calm down and just be supportive of her.
I was dressed as Lady Loki at Metrocon 2014 in Tampa, FL. I was walking through artist alley with my sister when a group of guys (all dressed as Deadpool) came up along side us. One of them shouted “Hey look! Loki’s horny!” and started ‘jacking off’ my Loki helmet. I was mortified and when we tried to get away they just kept following us yelling obnoxiously (attempting to be in character) “What you gonna do Loki? You can’t kill us!”
I was cosplaying with friends, and I was dressed as Princess Zelda from the Legend of Zelda. My story starts with my standing around chatting with a friend near a concessions stand at the convention/hotel when all of the sudden I felt hands grab my face and jerk my head away from the conversation I was having only to be face to face with a drunk buffoon who then said “I’ll never get another chance to do this!” at which time he proceeded to try and put his mouth on me. Thankfully I had enough time and whit about me to put my hand on his mouth to keep him from putting his mouth on me.
My friend (also a girl) who was horrified was trying to shove him off of me, and I punched him in the ribs with my other free hand a couple of times when my own attempts to push him away weren’t successful. Eventually, realizing he wasn’t going to be able to get what he wanted he took off running outside, at which time my friend took off her heels and chased after him in her bare feet. During the pursuit, she witnessed this guy blindside 4 other unsuspecting, cosplaying, women who were not as lucky as I was and unfortunately he put his mouth on them. She eventually lost sight of him and returned to our group. After filing a report with the con security we were told that if we saw him to come and get one of them. So as it so happened, much to my surprise, when we went outside to do a photoshoot some time later, we DID spot this guy again, and he, and his buddies were taking creeper pictures of my friend and I from a distance and making us feel very uncomfortable as they stood at a distance and just stared at us. My friend snuck off and got security. We watched a couple of security members come outside, identify the suspect, and the head of the con security approached him, spoke with him, and left.
Naturally having just been physically violated, I was shocked that this pervert was left standing there. So I went back to the security office at which time I witnessed a staff member in there joking around and asking if I was there about the “Serial Kisser”. Now being rather hot blooded over the blatant belittlement of being assaulted by someone along with a number of other women, I demanded to know why after putting his hands on me and trying to force himself on me and others, ruining my convention, he was still at large, allowed to be there and have a good time. So the head of security appeared and basically brushed me off saying that it was my word (and my friend’s and the other women for that matter) against his and that they told him that if he did it again they were going to take his badge away.
I am still furious about this. Not only is it violating, disrespectful, degrading, and disgusting but realistically that jerk could have been doing that to spread herpes or other diseases to people. Knowing or unknowing. This isn’t the days of the cavemen. You should not be permitted to just grab a girl up and force yourself on them, drunk or socially awkward or messed up in the head, or “you asked for it for dressing like that in public” I don’t care what excuse people use. There used to be a line that separated us from animals, who cant control themselves, but I am seeing that line becoming more and more blurred. I was not dressed up in a provocative cosplay, and even if I was, I shouldn’t have to be afraid to go to a convention, or anywhere and be afraid that some animal is going to try and do something to me against my will. But now I am, and I am not an easy person to scare. But I look over my shoulder now and stand with my back to a wall at cons and in public because of what happened and that’s a shame. No girl should ever have to worry about their safety. I am a huge advocate for having real security, or police present at these events because frankly, con security is either useless or a bunch of primeval cave dwellers that some how think that not only is that kind of behavior okay, but its also something to be made fun of and belittled. Thank you for taking the time to read my story.
Our Petition has over 2,500 signatures and we are here in San Diego ready to deliver the petition to San Diego Comic Con International! If you have a badge, you know they sent out a vague email Friday night saying that you can call the emergency number if you feel unsafe. Though there is still no definition of harassment, it has been made clear that the only harassment the convention feels is worthy of a response is that which would constitute an emergent enough harassment situation to call the emergency number. We deserve a harassment policy that allows for ALL con-goers to feel comfortable and safe in the comic convention setting – that sets the standards so much higher than “you deserve not to feel so unsafe that you need to call an emergency hotline” – but that you deserve to feel comfortable and not harassed.
Additionally, there is still no definition of what sort of behavior would actually lead to consequences for the harasser. If you do not have a badge – SDCC made no attempt to let you know about the policy – there was no social media update, no update to the policy page on the website, no post made on the SDCC blog. Press, who can be quite serious offenders, weren’t even notified until Tuesday. While this is by SDCC as being treated like a minor issue, radicalized by the “few” people who’ve experienced the harassment. Studies and personal experiences don’t lie. Janelle Asselin at Bitch Magazine did a survey of over 3,500 people, and the results are pretty staggering. And make it all the more alarming that Comic Con isn’t willing to at least make an effort to curb the harassment cosplayers experience.
Out of all respondents, 59 percent said they felt sexual harassment was a problem in comics and 25 percent said they had been sexually harassed in the industry. The harassment varied: while in the workplace or at work events, respondents were more likely to suffer disparaging comments about their gender, sexual orientation, or race. At conventions, respondents were more likely to be photographed against their wishes. Thirteen percent reported having unwanted comments of a sexual nature made about them at conventions—and eight percent of people of all genders reported they had been groped, assaulted, or raped at a comic convention. To put these percentages into perspective, if 13 percent of San Diego Comic-Con attendees have unwanted comments of a sexual nature made about them this week, that would be around 17,000 people. And if eight percent of SDCC attendees are groped, assaulted, or raped, that’s over 10,000 attendees suffering harassment.
While San Diego Comic Con continues to ignore our requests while making haphazard adjustments to their policies without publicizing them widely, male allies (including the hosts of Matty P’s Radio Hour), fellow cosplayers and geeks, and various press outlets have been covering San Diego Comic Con’s utter failure at their anti harassment effort. Because we all believe in Comic Con, at its roots, as a safe space to celebrate our geeky fandoms. Doug Porter said it well at San Diego Free Press:
What should be a dream-come-true event for fans of the genres involved has turned out to be a nightmare in recent years as an institutional malaise about dealing with harassment issues has surfaced. Last year photographs of attendee derrieres were posted online after Comic-Con as some sort of sick tribute to the misogynist mentality that’s flourished in recent events in San Diego and other cities.
Whether it’s only a handful of people who are made to feel unsafe, unwelcome, or unworthy at a convention just because of their gender, or truly a group of 17,000 strong – we are here in San Diego (and online) to say IT IS NOT OKAY. We will be at comic con all day Thursday Friday and Saturday collecting stories, monitoring the harassment reports, and providing resources for anyone who needs! Tweet us at @GeeksForCONsent if you are harassed, have been in the past, or otherwise want to chat about cosplayer harassment! Or if you just want a temporary tattoo or some harasser cards keep your eye out for us or tweet to find out our location! Looking forward to an awesome convention – and to meeting as many of you lovely geeks as we can. Here’s to hoping it is as harassment free as possible!
If you experience harassment – share your story at GeeksForCONsent.org and help us break the silence around this important issue so we can continue talking about ways to make conventions safer, more inclusive spaces.
Cross-posted from ElfGrove’s tumblr, originally posted in 2012.
So I was assigned a 4 hour shift (as opposed to the three hour shifts outlined in the volunteer info, fuck you SDCC — one day I’ll learn my lesson to not work for this con). I was assigned to the “Fulfillment Room” — which needs to change it’s name very badly. There was the opportunity to work in the room, exchanging tickets for prizes from panels or vouchers for volunteer/staff shirts or standing in the hallway holding a sign pointing to the room and yelling to direct people. I did not volunteer to work in the hallway, but got stuck out there because other people wouldn’t and someone who had fucking skipped all the way to the room suddenly had a “bad knee” and couldn’t stand for long periods. Damn my near-inability to lie.
The organizer people were nice enough for the first couple of hours, sent folk out to give us brief breaks for the restroom, and brought me a granola bar around noon since I was scheduled where lunch fell right in the middle of my long shift. Then they seemed to forget we were out there. They stopped sending people out to let us take bathroom breaks occasionally (not a big deal for me, but other volunteers had to abandon post a couple of times). I only got off shift when I saw multiple people from my shift who had been working in the room leave, and they were leaving late. I had to just abandon post and go back to the room and simply tell them I was leaving. They got new volunteers in and didn’t bother to dismiss the prior shift. Yeah, standing in a hall for 4 and a half hours yelling at crowds and being harassed by skeevy dudes is my idea of fun. Asshats.
Speaking of skeevy dudes. When someone is obviously on assignment to stand in a certain spot in a hall holding a sign and yelling at the crowds, their lack of ability to leave is not an invitation to keep hitting on them when they don’t initially respond to you. This wasn’t just me, another girl who was on the same assignment further down the hall was getting harassed so badly she briefly left her post to talk to me and make sure she wasn’t alone with the harassing dudes and so she could disappear until that particular group moved on. Skeevy dudes. “Fulfillment Room” does not have an unspoken “Sexual” in front of it, and especially the one dude sidling up to within less than six inches of me to whisper that you didn’t have a ticket but you wanted “Fulfillment” and surely I could give it to you right there right now anyways is so incredibly creeper-tastic I have no words. I try to sidle away, and this shithead follows me. There are no other staffers in sight, and his group of 3 male friends are standing off to the side watching and grinning. I’m on-duty, practically a captive audience, have to be polite because I am representing the con, have no back-up, and you are a foot taller than me. GO FUCK YOURSELF CREEPER. None of you are being unique, creative, or clever with that “Sexual Fulfillment Room” BS — which several clearly thought they were. I heard it more times than I could count.
Also, a lot of people were really upset that they couldn’t just walk in there and get free stuff without a redemption ticket. Like I can change the rules for you. The sticker says “Volunteer On Duty” — I do not have decision-making power. Even if I did, why would I change the rules just for your unique snowflake ass?
P.S. “Fulfillment” no longer sounds like a real word by the way.
EDIT: The big issues here was the total lack of information on what the volunteers could/should do when faced with sexual harassment and the not relieving the volunteers on duty when their shift was up. Standing in one spot and yelling for 4 hours is far from comfortable, and it should not have turned into four-and-a-half hours because no one could be bothered to manage the volunteers after the first 2 hours.
We were only given direction of where to stand, what to yell, not to abandon our post under any circumstances, and not to lean against the wall or sit down (even if there were chairs nearby). The staff surely know that this sort of shit happens, and they should either not send females out to stand by themselves or should have told us what to do if it got as bad as it did (Mr. Less-Than-Six-Inches-Of-Personal-Space).
The stupid comments don’t phase me so much. I’m a cosplayer, so you learn to deal. The guy invading my personal space and asking for sexual favors (while he had back-up and I did not) was beyond the deal-able norm for me. I was more concerned for the younger (clearly a minor) girl down that hall that panicked enough to seek refuge with me for a couple of minutes.
EDIT 2: Since this post is being referenced by an SDCC harassment article, a few updates. Please see follow ups to this post here, here, here (note that my friend and I both emailed and never received a response from the convention), and here.
I find it alarming that SDCC has no publicly posted harassment policy, and that the only training volunteers receive is one unlabeled page in a general orientation email attachment sent months before the con and is never mentioned again. (This is the 2013 edition.) Fun exerpts:
All harassment complaints should be documented in writing and submitted within twenty-four (24) hours, or as soon as it is possible.
All submitted complaints will be promptly and thoroughly investigated and appropriate action will be taken. The investigation will be as objective and complete as reasonably possible. Upon completion of the investigation, a determination will be made and the results will be communicated to the complainant, the alleged harasser and, as appropriate, to all others directly concerned.
If inappropriate conduct is proven, prompt and effective remedial action will be taken.
You must submit any reports of harassment in writing within 24 hours and wait an undetermined amount of time to see if they decide you have sufficiently proven that something bad happened. Then they will take unspecified “appropriate action”. This achieves nothing in regards to non-staff or non-volunteer harassment cases as the attendee harassers will be gone and not care and there is no hint that anything will actually be done save for the victim of harassment will be subject to as much scrutiny as the perpetrator.
Since there will inevitably be the question of “what were you wearing?” What a person is wearing is never EVER an invite nor justification to harass. You’re human beings and I expect you to exert the same self-control over your libido that I am am expected to do so over mine. That said, I was not dressed particularly provocatively, nor should it have made a difference if I were [see photos]. I am still a sentient fellow human being.
I have a history since 2006 with SDCC, as attendee and volunteer, there has never been a year when I was not sexually harassed at this con, and I cannot make that same comment of any of the several other cons I attend every year. #SDCC
Originally posted on ElfGrove’s tumblr in 2011.
Let me explain something about conventions and the convention atmosphere that is NOT okay. Touching people without their express permission. I’m not talking about brushing shoulders in crowded halls. That’s unavoidable. It’s the intentional touching, violating someone’s personal space. Regardless of your gender or sexual orientation. I don’t care. I do not know you, so it is NOT okay to touch me without me specifically saying it is okay.
Hey, you admire my costume. That is great. Thank you for the compliment. I appreciate it.
The next appropriate action is NOT to reach out and start fiddling with the edges of the chest flap (this was my Lady Blackhawk costume, Saturday night at the Hyatt Bar by SDCC), trying to pull at the snaps. When I look at you and surprise and mortification that you are violating my personal space, the appropriate response is NOT, “Oh, it’s okay. I’m gay.” I don’t care if you’re not attracted to women that way, you do not get to randomly start touching a stranger who is clearly uncomfortable with the situation. You sure as hell do NOT continue that unwanted physical contact after you realize the person is uncomfortable.
Boy is lucky I was 1) too shocked and horrified to punch his pink-dyed head off his shoulders, 2) trying to politely get him to stop (brushing his hands away and discouraging the conversation he was trying to start from continuing) on the assumption he was too drunk to know better, and 3) the point he was touching is practically all the way at my armhole, mostly away from the boob so I felt uncertain as to how threatening to interpret his behavior. You don’t know how my costume is constructed. If he had achieved what he seemed to be attempting (which was to open the edge of the front flap across the chest) he might have exposed me to the rest of the bar. Now, my costume doesn’t work that way, and It wouldn’t have shown anything because it is a fully zipped up jacket beneath the flap, but he did not know that, and he could have damaged my costume.
I didn’t stick around too much longer after that, but I would glance around and see the guy in the crowd (an Asian man with the top of his hair dyed pink stands out a bit) and he would nod at me and grin every time our eyes met. At one point he was poking a friend next to him and pointing at me. I had had 2 drinks at that point and felt really uncomfortable and unsafe when I saw that he was still paying attention to where I was, and not very far away.
My wingmen (two male friends) kind of failed at backing me up. They stood and watched while I tried to politely get this guy to stop touching me. I’m shy when it comes down to the bones of things, and the old school Southern sensibilities from Grandma are what kick in when I panic for myself. They said afterward that they had been concerned, but weren’t sure if they needed to step in or not. Of course, there was a mixed message to my forceful attitude an hour earlier when a homeless guy separated Julius from the rest of the group while we were walking down the street and had initially told him no to the request for money. He put his arm around Julius and literally pulled him away from the group. I had stepped back, grabbed Julius’s hand and started towing him back into our crowd of friends while insisting we had someplace to be and were in a hurry. So me being less forceful an hour later when someone starts harassing me is confusing, I get that.
However, General Advice: if your friend looks uncomfortable and the first “No” is not getting the stranger to back off, please step in. I don’t care about the gender or whatever involved. Sometimes it’s hard for the person at the center of the attention to speak up for themselves and get an escape.